Landers Plaza employees anxiously anticipating August, receiving yearly paychecks

LANDERS PLAZA – Company associates and employees from departments across the building are waiting in excitement for mid-August to arrive along with their yearly big checks.

“This year I’m planning to put a budget together,” said Lewis Wright from Human Resources. “I bought a speed boat and backpacked through Europe for a week when I got my check last year. I’ve been eating Ramen noodles now for 8 months.”

Alice Pentegrass from Accounting, currently accumulating a mountain of credit card debt, told reporters that she’s already picking out what song to dance to on the Big Check Stage next month, leaning heavily towards Ton Loc’s ‘Funky Cold Medina‘.

“I usually end up moving back into my parents basement during June and July, just to keep my head above water,” noted William Turner, 39, manager of Research and Development. “It gets crowded in there with my wife and three kids, but we make it work. It’s only till August though, then it’s back to a house come payday!”

At press time, a company email was sent out reminding all employees that no one is allowed in the Fun Room unless their account statement was ready.

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