Editorial: Every Kid In My Turf Had Straight A’s or ADHD

Ole Miss student manager April Morris

AM: Did anyone else notice this, or was it just in Canton, Ohio? Every family I met this summer had kids with straight A’s, or they had ADHD. I didn’t even have to ask, people usually just told me right off the bat.

I mean, I would be introducing myself to them at the door and telling them I was talking to all the families about a study system, and they would just interrupt me about how their kids made straight A’s. First off, why do they keep interrupting? That’s kinda rude. Second, why do they think that because their kids do well in school that that’s a reason not to have a conversation with me about education? For reals.

The other kids in my turf all had ADHD — Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. I remember my first summer when all the kids just had ADD. Then ADHD started to pop up more often, and now it’s become the new fad to puke about for parents with kids who can’t sit still. First off, are they just being normal energetic kids or do they really have ADHD? I bet 99% of these cases are self-diagnosed from Web MD, Wikipedia, or Tammy next door. Second, why do they think that because their kids run around like rabid monkeys that that’s a reason not to have a conversation with me about reading to them? Cereally. And stop interrupting me!

Sidenote: If you think your kid has ADHD, why are you letting them drink a giant Red Bull at 9am while playing video games? That can’t help.

So from the 1,116 families I sat down with this summer, and the other 2,100 who I approached, I found that every kid in Canton falls into one of these two categories: smart as a whip or unable to listen to a complete sentence, and their parents won’t stop interrupting me.

Anyone else?

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