ROCKVILLE – A mysterious and somewhat eerie feeling lay in the air today as first year dealer Miles Allman began his fourth day of summer sales, but still has not yet come across one person who knows even a single minute detail about another soul living in their surrounding homes. Allman paused between his first and second goal period today to address reporters saying, “I can’t figure this place out. It’s a really pretty town, but no one knows who lives even next door to them — no one. It’s almost spooky. It’s like, what’s really going on around here, you know? Should I be worried myself?”
Allman began asking residents on Monday morning of his first day if they “knew who had any kids around here and if they were home” to no avail, but has nevertheless continued to inquire ever since.
“Whoever lives in that green house over there told me that maybe I should try a neighborhood on the other side of interstate 270, and that’s as much as anyone’s told me all week. This city is like its own little bubble of some type of haunted paradox,” explained the confused dealer.
Allman ended his interview mentioning plans of maybe talking louder at the next house hoping that might help.